In writing this blog, two quotes come to mind:
" The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry" – To A Mouse by Robert Burns
" The road to hell is paved with good intentions" – Anonymous
My reason for submitting these quotes? Well err err hmmmm. *Sigh*. I made a right mess of my lenten penance. While I must say that I lasted more than a month with my "No Meat" penance, the others all went to "pot" at one point or another.
The "No Sex" rule didn’t even make it past the second week of March. Due to difficult circumstances…., the exegencies of the situation…….."Steups". I just had no self control. What was I doing to put myself in such a situation? Flirting, that is what. When will I ever learn that flirting doesn’t help the situation at all. It is even worse when there are little or no feelings for the person and therefore you end up feeling a whole pang of guilt as a result. The weird thing is that I went to the person to find out some info and well…well i started flirting thinking that the info would be easily obtained without much effort. Alas, they had more gumption than I expected. "Never underestimate your opponent even if you regard them as being intellectually inferior". Needlessto say, even though there was no sex or any foreplay (lol the faint of heart stop reading now), I compromised way too much and guess what??? The info wasn’t worth the sacrifice. Duped like a fool and the other party was satisfied. Hmmm seems like God punished me immediately for my transgression. Alas the foolish girl tried again with more "allegedly good information" but it wasn’t happening again. Not for all the Peanut Butter in the world. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice. shame on me.
Of course, let me not leave you with the impression that that incident was theonly trangression. There were others after that, but with willing parites on both sides. However, the feeling of guilt never subsided. It just came back in full force and sometimes stronger whenever my head cleared. LOL
The No CD rule.SIGH. April 5th 2006 was a really bad day and I was just itching to spend some money. Lo and behold, Prince’s new CD "3121" was available. I approached the CD store and never looked back. Surprisingly, the CD is brilliant and nothing has happened so far in the way of penance for my immediate transgression. A valuable lesson was learnt however. I learnt that that i can go a month or more without purchasing CDs and that there are healthier ways to spend my money (or not spend it as the case may be). I saved money for the month of March so for that I am proud of myself. Of Course, my little brother is getting married at the end of April so there goes the savings….( I will ignore the urge to talk on the subject of marriage and the fact that it is happening to everyone but me.)
The NO MEAT rule.
Well this was scheduled to bomb within a week of starting, but surprisingly i mastered it to some extent and was able to last without meat for over 30 days. I even made others around me aware of my goal and many were supportive. Some lamented that I won’t lose a pound and more likely that I would increase in size as a result of my rule. I am happy to say that 8 pounds were lost in the first few weeks of my rule and they have stayed off so far. Last week Saturday, I went to Patraj and was about to order a Vegetable Buss-Up-Shot, when a voice inside told me that "no self respecting trini would be eating veggies alone when a Beef Buss-Up-Shot would hit the spot". So, I obliged.
The only reason that I gave in had to do with my state of mind at the time. I have been working very long hours this past month (with both Work and the Play). My energy levels have not been sustainable for some time and I find myself constantly irritable. I would snap at the wind if it blew too hard. Given these factors, I reasoned that if i had some meat in my diet again that my energy levels would be resorted and my disposition would improve. RESULT? Nothing….absolutely nothing…(but the beef tasted REAL good). Who would have thought that the reason for my sagging energy levels and high degree of irritability was due to a lack of rest? Hmmm it just didn’t dawn on me that this could be the reason. Guess I heard what i wanted to hear.
Since then, meat has featured very infrequently into my diet and I think that I will therefore limit my intake of same to weekends. Honestly, my farts no longer smell and doing stuff in the toilet..well..let’s just say that the "Six Second Air Freshener Spray Rule" is no longer applied. (And thanks goodness for that, those Air Neutralizers were proving to be really expensive).
All in all, this lenten period has been very much an eye-opener in terms of my ability to have some "Self Control". While in the final analysis, i couldn’t maintain it like Jesus did in the desert. I still believe that the sacrifices made proved my ability to commit to a cause and that i am willing to change my habits once I have made up my mind.
So since this period of abstinence was a moderate success, i will begin a new quest at the end of this lenten period. I will endeavor to lose 20 pounds in two months without the use of supplements and any drugs like Hydroxycut.
Is that laughing I hear? Are you really laughing at me? Steups..Do I look as if I care?
So what if you know that I detest exercise and that i consider gyms to be the playground of the intellectually challenged. I have tennis and once the play is over, I will try and run on occasion. I just need to find a healthy way to increase my cardio-vascular levels. You just wait and see.
I will therefore prempt each blog update with a weight check. So I will give my weight on the issuance of my next blog entry. No it won’t be in two weeks time. I am not as scared as telling others my weight as i used to be. So what if i am a little chubby, no harm done. Plus the two bastards who told me over this weekend that my stomach looks cuddly are going to die a slow death. I do not have a big stomach…Bastards…….
Breathe…Breathe…. WoooSaaaH WooooSaaah.
There all better.