All At Sea

08 Aug

I am taking a chance here. i have never considered myself an artist or much less even a poet or any form or fashion. I remember writing a poem in High School about a Rabbit (never had one) and getting an “A” on it. How I got the “A”, I will never know. The poem sucked big time and rhymed at every turn. School Teachers are so kind when they want to be.
However in the course of my life, i have met many people and few have encouraged me to be expressive in writing as much as my friend  William “Byrd” Wilkins.  He wrote poetry and did performance pieces with such raw power and voracity that after any of his readings I would rush home and try my hand at writing but it always seemed infantile and dare i say…trite. He told me once to let the writing pour out. He said that the cliched words and phrases would pour out initially and then the real you would be displayed.  It is mind-blowing to me how such an artistic force as “Byrd” is wasn’t more successful but then again, everyone has their season and his I am sure his is approaching soon.
So today, I throw caution to the wind and present a poem. It’s not anything great but I am proud of it because it took me a long while to get to the place where writing down my thoughts, emotions etc didn’t involve me feeling less powerful or in any measure of a vulnerable state. I think the poem sucks but then again i have written others that i can only use as toilet paper.  This poem is not about anyone in particular, just an amalgamation of experiences. And anyone who thinks differently….hmmmm it’s not who you think it is….LOL  Hopefully, you like it.   So here I go….caution to the wind….sigh….self exposed…sigh….all at sea…

Intervention ————–
This is my attempt at talking
My biggest attempt at speech
My bold attempt at expression
All my barriers are in breach
This is my attempt at control
Warring factions are all I see
This is my attempt at a love song
Only because you confuse me
This is my wish for sanity
A wish on the scale of world peace
This is a wish for intervention
For medication that brings calm and release
This is a wish for explanation
Why do the voices not cease?
This is my wish for a love song
To calm this rambling beast.
Someone please explain my paranoia
Why can’t I seem to think straight?
Hourly thoughts of you are the norm now
Yet my existence to you is a point of debate
My friends say I’m in love. How?
An emotional state that is totally not deliberate
So this is my attempt at a love song
Please help this baffled one clear the slate.
I’ve given up trying to understand you
Or the many parlour tricks you display
My heart and mind loved the illusions
Yet all it felt was hurt and continual dismay
I know that you made no promises
My deception was all self-inflicted
So I attempt to write a love song
To explain why I am so addicted
My thoughts are clearer
My heart is right
You’ve lost some of the power
I gave you in my life
We’ll never be friends
Never be lovers
But here’s what BITCH!!
You’ve lost
The Perfect Stalker!!!
This is my attempt at venting
My biggest attempt at release
My initial attempt at expression
Was confused, misguided and weak
This is my attempt at closure
Of forgiving the fool that ran after thee
This was my attempt at a love song
I know my worth, finally
……How bout that?

Posted by on August 8, 2006 in Music, Poetry, Relationships


Tags: , , , , ,

4 responses to “All At Sea

  1. Matthew

    August 8, 2006 at 14:40

    ….how bout that……

  2. Trini

    August 10, 2006 at 14:03

    Very entertaining as usual 🙂

  3. Ari

    August 10, 2006 at 14:56

    I totally see all your points of view – very interesting….your attempt of a love song is universal…u are not alone…..

  4. Michael

    August 17, 2006 at 13:12

    Stefan, wonderful attempt.  No poet myself I found it well written and structured.  I particularly love the last lines and the sense of closure and self awakening they convey.  I join that list of people who encourage you t o write.  I look forward to the mext attempt (hopefully there will be no need for another love song). 


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