Again I come to you with my week in recap as these days i can’t seem to find the time to write in the office nor at home. This past week has been another slightly crazy one ranging from an anal probe to me attempting to lie to avoid doing something. All will be explained as you read on.
Monday 11th – Nothing much to report here except that since rehearsal was at 8pm, i decided to venture to the gym and work out for a while and then run home, change and then head back to the Trinidad Theatre Workshop for that night’s onslaught of musical mishappenings. This was a bad idea in the history of bad ideas. I completely forgot that tonight was "Movement night" at rehearsal, so it didn’t necessitate me making the gym run. When i tell you that my old bones are being stretched to their limit, i am not lying. The guy in charge of the movement class is a Dance Choreographer named Christopher. He is good at what he does but seems to forget that most of the cast has little or no dance experience, so when he goes into certian positions or asks us to kick our legs high, he is getting movement that resembles the "Praise You" Video by FatBoy Slim and a really bad episode of "Fame". His final torture selection for that night was something called Japanese Squats, where you attempt to sit in mid-air while maintaining some sort of balance and composure. This torture was inflicted on us for 5 minutes and my thighs apparently reported to my brain that I was an idiot for going to the gym earlier. Plus it mumbled something about Haagen Das ice cream being in the freezer at home and it beng compensation for this inhuman torture.
That night Haagen Das’ Caramel Cone and a litre of water was my treat to worn out body.
This was one hell of a day. It began with me going to do an annual medical check-up for the Bank’s Insurance Plan. Everything was standard except the fact that I was informed by the Doctor that she needed to check my prostate. Proswho? When? How? was my cowardly response. Now I had had my prostate checked once before like 7 years ago and ibeleived that the indian Doctor who made me curl into a fetal position to do it was just getting his jones on ( apparently one only checks for prostate over the age of 30 and at that initial exam, I was in my early 20s. I took the rest of the day off after that exam. Felt dirty). This one I promsied myself would not phase me in the slightest. i would be brave and ready for the non-consensual invasion of my anal region.
Well this female doctor was flirting with me all during my check-up. Asking questions i knew weren’t standard ones but ididn’t mind as i tohught she was trying to keep me relaxed. She inquired about my abode and whether I am close to my mother and father etc and if i had plans to be married anytime soon. I made light fun of all of her questions and threw them back at her with the same speed. Her answers weren’t so forthcoming but then again she was close to my mother’s age so her responses would not be the same as mine.
Anyway she asked me to go nto the fetal position and she began the horrific experience:
Doctor: ( initial inspection) Hmmm well you don’t have any piles.
My inner thought: Piles….what hell she on about?
Doctor: (inserts finger as she says) Take a deep breath
My inner thought: Breath in and OMG she aint let me gasp a good amount of air!!! Where that fnger going?
Doctor: Hmmm ok there is the prostate and it seems fine
My inner thought: OK come out now
Doctor: Let me check on the other side
My inner thought: She in there too long. What she looking for ? A Hamster?
Doctor: (on pulling out her finger) See that wasn’t hard and you are fine.
My inner thought (vocalised to her): Yuh buying me dinner later?
Doctor: Excuse me?? i didn’t hear that.
Me: You know that we are officially dating now?
Doctor: Oh really!!!
Me: Yes, You have gone further with me than anyone else in my life, so obviously we have a special bond. So What time are you picking me up for dinner later?
Doctor: (Blushing like a little school girl) Aaah Well.Well….(giggles). It’s my job and i guess patients and doctors will always have that special bond.
Me: So i take it that you are brushing me off after this little tryst?
Doctor: (Laughs out loud and flicks back her short hairdo) Mr. Simmons you are something else. Thank you for brightening up my day.
Me: Hmmm Avoiding the question. Ahhh classic signs that you don’t want to see me anymore. No problem. I can take it. i’ve been rejected before. Ah wel, do have a nice day doc.
She leaves the room giggling and shaking her head but not saying a word.
I put back on my clothes and leave the office and head back to work. i still feel a bit violated but i made the experience funny and therefore not as embarassing as before.
The Night The Choir Died
That night however saw me trying my best to get out of going to a Marionettes Choir Rehearsal. Now Marionettes is one of the leading choirs in Trinidad and Tobago and to be a part of them may be a very good experience. but as much as i like to sing and am willing to learn more about vocal technique etc, i just have this aversion to choirs.
I had already decided that i would list my hectic schedule including my new job and its reponsibilities as the reaosn why i may not be able ot be an active member of the choir. On arrivng there, they heard my reasons and still made me sit down for a rehearsal. Then the Choir Director makes the big mistake and sealed the deal for me on not being part of this ensemble. She is at her lectern and she addresses te choir and annouces that the have a new choir member. Then she digs her grve in my mind, with the following statements;
GT: now our new Choir member is Phil De Thrill’s son and he real bright cause he gets promotions at his job at RBTT etc and he also was in The lLon King in Germanyso we expecting big things from him.
My inner voice: She just lost she mind!!!!! Who would want to work with me after that intro????
I was pissed. i don’t like people annoucing anything about me other than what has been approved by Me. i just wanted to join a choir and learn as my skills though to many may seem advanced are sorely lacking and therefore I want a chance to learn like everyone else. I excused myself 45 minutes into the rehearsal and exited over to the other rehearsal that i have a standing engagement with. I vowed never to step foot in that choir space again. Why do people do that? It is not that I am unhappy or ashamed of my accomplishments, it is just that I prefer to enter any organisation on equal footing with the rest and earn my stripes that way. What she did was to set me up so that anything I do wrong would be seen as the Lion King boy who can’t cut it in the choir.
Wednesday 13th to Saturday 16th
Nothing much happened for the rest of the week except that i went to a wedding on saturday and ended up sitting next to wannabes Winnie Mandela and Khafra Kambon who needed to give me and the rest of ppl on the table a black history lesson during the Dinner portion of the event. They were lucky that at the time I was eating Curry Goat so i didn’t hear a word they were saying ’cause the food was very tasty and my tastbuds and brain we having there own conversation on whether we should get a second helping or not.
BTW: Congratulations to Raefer and Charlene Weston on a really nice wedding. I know that I took pics as if I was your personal photgrapher but i just had to try out my new digital camera on the event. We will see how the pics turn out. A few of them i like and will post on my page.
Movement class again at rehearsal but this time, the bitches were in fine form and by the end of evening i was drained and all over my body hurt. Who the helltold them that i could do any form of high kick with out upsetting my groin is beyond me. Pluswe did some floor exercises that while they were good for the abs, they were a killer on me and so for the rest of the evening i did not speak in protest of the pain inflicted upon me. Some moron suggested the Japanese squats after that murderous session and i shot them one death stare and the suggestion was recented immediately. If we had done it. The subject title of my blog would have been, "Murder Was The Case That They Gave Me".
Anyway, the reason i am walking on sunshine has to do with the fact that the Show has been postponed until April 2007 owing to the inavailability of the orchestra during the initial schedule show run time. The score is supposed to be entirely played by Steel pan and as such getting the whole thing together and in sync with the hectic shedule of the Steelbands in Trinidad proved to be nightmarish. Other than that, the director talked about how the piece has started to take on new life and new ideas keep coming to him on ways to manipulate the cast etc. So this delay will be good in helping him achieve the type of vision he has for the production. I haveno doubt in the man’s abilities as a director as he has won the Best Director Award everytime he has been nominated for our Local Drama Awards (The Caciques).
All tihs means is that I can finally breath again and get some much needed sleep as well as work on my fitness level etc. it will also give me a chance to settle into my new job without jeopardising it by tellng them that i could not travel in October due to me doing a Musical at Queen’s Hall. God always works things out for the best even though we may not recognise it initially. Thanks GOD. You have my back.
And how was your week?