This has been bugging me for sometime now but the more I think about it, the angrier I get.
I pride myself in being the type of person that uses logic when trying to get my point across to someone rather than emotional hysteria. Alas, in some of my attempts, I fail miserably. Trying to bestow logic on an individual is like me trying to fit into a Waist size 29 pair of jeans. It just aint happening. No matter how hard you try.
For all intents and purposes I always try to remain calm and collected when I anticipate that I am about to have a difficult conversation with someone. The flaw in my plan is that, I assume that :
- the other person will be a rational thinking as I am or that
- the person’s knows that they done something wrong and will be remorseful
and therefore will see my point and accept defeat (well not really accept defeat but more like bend to my will,, no understanding). Why am I going on like this? Let me present my situation to you and let you be the judge.
I lent about 10 original DVDs to friend of mine named
Raphael Nigel on January 17th 2009. At the time he was in between jobs and said he wanted an easy distraction from spending money. Watching movies always did it for him and kept him from going out to drink etc.
Now I am always hesitant to lend my stuff out as people normally don’t know how to care for other people’s property but given his situation at the time, I said that I would be nice. I instructed him that he was to handle them with care and treat them as if they were his own (hindsight is always 20/20). He promised me that I had nothing to worry about.
My Ten DVDs
· My So-Called Life Box Set
· Across The Universe
· Incredible Hulk
· Indiana Jones Trilogy
· City of God
· Skins- Season One
· Y Tu Mama Tambien
We cut to April 26th 2009 when I give him a call requesting the return of my DVDs since I have not heard from him since the time her borrowed them:
Nigel: Boy, I aint finish watch all of dem yet. Hey have you seen Wolverine yet? I have a copy of it
Me: No I am good on that end. Umm you have had them for some time now I would really like them back.
Nigel: Oh Ok ..hold on…(I hear rustling in the background)
Nigel: Yeah yuh could pass for them.
Me: Pass for them? Didn’t you come to my house to borrow them? Why can’t you pass and drop them off?
Nigel: Oh God why yuh moving so? Ah washing right now and I doh have time to do that plus is you who want them.
Me: You had them since January….You don’t think that is a long time to be holding onto someone else’s property
Nigel: Is only DVDs.man. What is de big problem?
Obviously whatever I am saying is lost on him so in the spirit of living peaceably with all men…
Me: Here’s what. Let me pass for the ten DVDs now since I know u home.
Nigel: Ten? You aint lend me ten DVDs
I feel the left side of my head tighten. Oh God I’m getting a stroke
Me: Yes I did. (I proceed to list them out)
Nigel: Oh ho..yeah yeah yeah. My bad. Oh I don’t have all here Some across by my girlfriend, but they safe
(Oh God….my right eye is out of focus right now and my right arm is also going numb…I think I am having a stroke)
Me: Buh Wha de mudder ass wrong wid u!!!!! What dey doing dere? I len she anything?
(As you can see, English is failing me at this point as I am losing my cool)
Nigel: But wha’ppen boy…I tell yuh dey safe. How u getting on bitter so?
Me: Bitter? Obviously you using the word in the wrong context? My problem is that I lent YOU the DVDs and if u carried them over to your girlfriend’s house then you should’ve brought them back to your place afterwards.
Nigel: Dread I sleep over and I just leave them there. Yuh go get dem back man.
Nigel: Me aint know nah.. She kinda not talking to me these days…..
Me: Here’s what organize yuh business and get me ALL of my DVDs by Saturday 2nd May. Ok?
Nigel: you real bitter boy?
Me: What am I to be bitter about? I just think you should have taken better care of the things I lent you. Is that too much to ask?
Nigel: Hear nah, right now you real upsetting me and I not in a mood for this shit so I gone.
Me: Saturday eh.. ah not playing.
(He hangs up)
Not in a mood? Upset? He has had my DVDs since January and he is upset that I want them back? The nerve of some people!!
In the past, I have been accused of not having faith in humanity and all that touchy feely stuff but when stuff like this happens, you kinda have to believe in your base theory. People are idiots. I did him a favour by lending him my DVDs and now I am the one upsetting him? In the past three months it never dawned on him to return the stuff to me now that he has a new job?
People, am I insane? Am I being unreasonable here? Should I have let him return it when he was good and ready? (Please!! Not even I agree with that last statement).
And what is this bitter thing? I don’t get it. For someone over 30years of age with a solid education in their back pocket, I expected more. I guess I am learning my lesson that common sense is not as common as many make it out to be.
How was your weekend?