I learnt over the last two months (or as we in the Caribbean call it…July/August Vacation).
I am restless again.
I can’t explain it but there comes a time, every couple of years, when I sit down and just know that I need something new and exciting to be going on in my life. Since moving back to Trinidad in 2005, I have been trying to find something new to occupy my time. When I got home I ballooned from 200lbs to 250lbs in a couple of months. Then I started a hectic fitness regimen that lasted for all of the latter part of 2006 and all of 2007. Never was I so skinny or fit as I was during that period. Then came the lull. The plateau period where the exercising wasn’t doing it for me anymore. It wasn’t enough to keep the demons at bay. Then the “I need something new to do or I’ll just stay here and eat” phase arrived in 2008. Nothing much happened in that year and in 2009 I am trying new things but this time the restlessness is just not subsiding. It is growing exponentially.
I started Rosetta Stone Language Learning online in July (Spanish and German) but after two weeks of a strong start, I am down to visiting the site like once a week. Plus I am annoyed with getting stuff wrong and the pronunciation sections are kicking my ass. Words that I know I can pronounce correctly, the program is failing me on them. “Tschuss” a word I have used EIGHT million times while living in Germany, is a source of pain for me with the program. It keeps telling me that I can’t pronounce the word and therefore I keep getting less than 90% correct in sections that require me to speak into the microphone. Sigh…..I don’t like not getting 100%. So I am losing interest in these things now. Jeez I need to work on my commitment skills.
I started tennis back the other day (but we will talk about that later) and I am desperately trying to find a place where I can swim or take some sort of swim classes so I can improve on my technique or extreme lack thereof. Flapping ones arms in a pool and not being able to make one lap is embarrassing for someone who should know how to swim well. Lately I have been convincing myself that not being stuck in a gym will give me the impetus to keep at these cardio activities. We’ll see.
Work is so-so and I’ve made it a point of not talking about work on my blog lest some co-worker or idiot (same thing sometimes) decide that they can finally operate their email and send it out to the masses. And well the performance part of my life is stuck in somebody else’s life as I haven’t done anything creative in ages.
As we speak I am going to be doing a series of readings over 4 days for a play called “Playing Hamlet”. I was kinda happy when I got called then I saw that my character only comes in the Second Act (Page 67) and then stays there for 20 pages then leaves. I was like…”ummm u call me out my house for this?” But beggars can’t really be choosers. The good thing about it is that my character is really cool and funny and when he enters he really makes u laugh. I could live with that. Hey DameJudy Dench got an Oscar for less screen time than that. HAHAHAHAHAHA (nervously) Oh boy I am one sad puppy!!!
WEDDINGS & COMMITMENT
No more weddings!!!
I have been to four wedding for the year and I honestly think that is 3 too many. And the strange thing is that all my invitations just listed my name. No “Plus 1” or “& Guest”, Nope, just Stefan Simmons. Only the groom at the last wedding asked me like a month before I got the invitation if I wanted to bring someone. Even when I told him I might, I got my invitation for one.
I blame it on the fact that to compensate for coming to the weddings alone, I would take pictures with my Panasonic Lumix Camera (which I love). So in the end I figured out that these people invited me alone so that I would not be constrained in having to sit by my date and instead would be able to get good wedding shots/ angles that their official and more expensive wedding photographer missed. As I write this I know that one of my wedding pics is the desktop background of one of my co-workers. I find that fact brings a joy to my heart. And I know it isn’t there for my benefit but because she really liked it.
At each of these wedding, I hung out with the same people and it was always a standard joke with me and their spouses about why such a handsome man like me is still single ( the handsome line always makes me blush like an idiot still at this age). One guy’s wife even says if she was younger she would grab me up. My response to her: “I have been known to cause women to scream at me for no other reason but in frustration. Do you want that?” She says that I am a baby and that she can handle me. I laugh internally and say “Many have tried and all have failed.” Then the topic always switches to my apparently obvious fear of commitment.
Ignore what you’ve heard or thought of me. I know that I am not a commitment-phobe. I am capable of having long term relationships and making them work. Let me give you examples of my ability to commit.
- I have been renting the same place for almost 4 years now.
- I have numerous god-children. All who know me well (This speaks to the fact I am able to bond with others for long periods)
- I have a 2 year contract with my internet service provider. This was a task but the savings made the decision easier
- I’ve had the same friends for close to ten years.
- I am committed to a 6 year loan with my car and we are almost at the end of year 4. We are still together.
- I once paid for my gym membership in 3 month intervals. (now THAT is blind commitment)
I think that is enough proof. Don’t you?
So all you naysayers out there!! Stefan knows what he wants and is not running from anything. Well I will run from anyone that tells me they love me within 24 hour period of meeting me but that is not fear of commitment that is fear of mad people.
I am totally UNFIT.
After a slew of tennis lessons for the past three months (twice a week), I haven’t lost a pound. Walking up a flight of stairs still has me breathing hard. Plus I haven’t gotten rid of my second trimester stomach. No matter how hard I try (um well honestly, on the days I don’t have tennis I kinda just sit at home and eat…so I guess it’s not my fault?). Now I bitch and moan about this because after I finish an hour of tennis I am gasping for air and crawling to my bag at the side of the court. My coach just hits the ball everywhere for me and he says I have the energy in me to get it wherever it lands. He obviously is mistaking me for someone who wants to do this professionally. He even declared that I will be ready to play tournaments in 6 months time. Three months have passed and me no think so……
Movies were lame this year so far but here are some observations:
- JJ Abrams can reboot/re-imagine the phonebook and I’d watch it over and over again. I LOVED STAR TREK!!!!! I didn’t care for Spock as much as everyone else but it was still an effective movie.
- Wolverine, Transformers and G.I. Joe, all left me feeling a bit cheated and not totally satisfied. Transformers 2 was just a waste of time for me.
- The Hangover, Drag Me to Hell and District 9 were surprisingly entertaining and blew me out of the park for exactly what I expected from these movies. I still laugh when remembering the “Tiger in the bathroom” scene from the Hangover.
Honestly, don’t you think that the “Summer” Blockbusters this year sucked and weren’t very good at all? I miss the days when u ran to see a big budget movie and left the theatre in with “WOW” written all over your face. Independence Day still does that to me sometimes (I hear snickering…..Go to HELL!!). Now when I leave the movie theater, my face normally looks perplexed and all it says is “ Well that was interesting.”
Ummm was there any good summer music this time around? I only bought 8 CDs over the past two months and two of those are for voice lessons (Stop Snickering). The other I totally enjoy is by a self –titled debut CD by an artist called Kina ( she is also my FB friend now). Yup things are really bad for Summer 2009
Maxwell Maxwell Maxwell Maxwell – Welcome Back to the Music!!! Took you long enough….
Black Eyed Peas – why are they still around?
Taylor Swift – Yawn
Drake – Ok catchy songs but where is the album?
Keri Hilson – Knock You Down is catchy (nuff said)
I was really bored this season. Nothing inspiring came out at all during this perod.
September has started off well so far with the New Whitney Houston Album. It is not as bad as I thought it would be and there are some surprisingly good songs on it but it seems she continues her quest from the album “Just Whitney” to butcher classic tunes. I can’t seem to get her ending line of her cover of “You Light Up My Life”. “You light up my loooooooooooof “ is just ridiculous and I can’t get it out of my head. Then on this album she turns my favorite Donny Hathaway song “ A Song For You” into some disco crap. Sigh….be still…..Let it go…… Other than that, her new album is really not that bad. The first three songs on it are really catchy while all being slightly camp. Go buy it. Save Bobbi Kristina’s College Fund!!!
My favorite one eyed giant
I know I watch it way too much, but it keeps boredom at bay as well as keeping me focused on the new helpful invention that would help me clean my apartment and not build up a sweat. With the Swiffer/Swivel and Oxy Clean proving to be failures so far, I am on the hunt for something new.
I am in love with TRUE BLOOD on HBO. The first season was okay and had some interesting characters, but the second season just kicked itself into high gear and never stopped. I was officially hooked on a vampire based show when all around me I was being flooded with alternative vampires (Twilight, Vampire Diaries etc). I highly recommend this series to anyone interested in seeing how rednecks get on when vampires move to their parts.
My guilty pleasure has also been a show on Fox called GLEE. Anyone that knows me, knows I will fall hook line and sinker for a TV show that is funny and has some music involved. Up comes Glee with a cast of hilarious characters and a soundtrack right off the Top 40. The singing is good and though there are a few lip-syncing problems, I just can’t stop watching it. I saw the second episode for the fifth time last night and can’t help but thinking that the Cheerleading Coach (played by Jane Lynch) has to win an Emmy for being just the funniest character on TV in ages. She is also a riot as Charlie’s Therapist on Two & a Half Men.
Also, I am in love with the Food Network!!!! ( You really have to ask why? ) Iron Chef, Chopped, “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives” and just about every other program on it even those cake decorating shows. . What I can’t stand is “Down Home with the Neelys”, “Big Daddy”, Rachel Ray and every other program that has that Southern woman named Paula. She cooks with things that should read “triple bypass approved”. Why is she on? The Neelys just annoy me every time they get all “lovey dovey” on the screen. All that kissing and flirting is not necessary to cook food. It drives me mad. Who the hell says. “You know how I like it daddy!!” while trying to teach someone on screen to sauté fish a certain way? UUGH just annoying. And Big Daddy, ummm I mean Big Girly..cause why do u have all those hoops in your ears to cook? Nothing you make looks appetizing. UmmRacehl Ray…grabbing a handful of something can never be considered a teaspoon measurement (you crazy woman!!)
Any way The Food Network is now programmed into favorites. I won’t be doing any recipes from it but hey I can live a little and have my mouth salivate at some of the stuff these ppl cook up. Plus I don’t gain any weight even with all that food around me.
How come so many celebrities’ contracts with the Devil ended this year? Hmmmm
Yes I know that was a heartless statement to make but honestly, celebrities are dying off like flies this year. I refuse to believe that my age has anything to do with the fact that I know most of these people that have left us……..
Here is a short list:
Michael Jackson Farah Fawcett Molly Sugden Bea Arthur Eartha Kitt
Patrick Swayze Karl Malden Walter Cronkite Ted Kennedy DJ AM
Les Paul Corazon Aquino Billy Mays Ed McMahon David Carradine
Chuck Daly Dom Deluise Natasha Richardson Ron Silver Wendy Richards Ricardo Montalban
Ok I must admit, some of them have been here since the time of “Moses” so I guess it was their time but some just went way too soon. I will surely miss Molly Sugden and Wendy Richards from “Are You Being Served?”. They provided me with hours of non-stop laughter when I was growing up. Bea Arthur will always be my sarcastic benchmark in knowing if I have gone too far. Michael Jackson will just always be Michael. He was the one who gave me that brilliant “Off The Wall” album and whose “Invincible” album, I still regard as being highly underappreciated and underrated.
Good bye Mr. Rouke or as Captain Kirk would say KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!
Nobody will ever put baby in the corner again….
I will miss them all in one way or another.