It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine….fine
So, I wasn’t “raptured” on Saturday, and if you are reading this, then I guess you weren’t either.
I must admit that I did not believe nor even react to the announcement earlier this month that the World would end, aka “The Rapture” would take place, on May 21, 2011 at 6pm (how specific can you get!!). On first hearing it, I scoffed at the notion. I was raised on excessive amounts of Sunday School teachings so I knew that no man knows the hour nor day when God would return. It did however raise an interesting question:
QUESTION: If God were to really announce his return, would we believe it?
In this age of Beyonce, Lady Gaga, Bieber, Ke$ha , Glee, Ipads, Droid Technology and self indulgent idiots who post half naked pics of themselves in bathrooms on Facebook, would we even know that something this significant was happening?
Would we even care if God decided that he wanted to give us all a chance to repent and fix our lives so he gave us a fixed deadline in which to do it? Would we do it? Would we take up the challenge or would we continue to be caught up in the drivel that sometimes consumes us.
I didn’t know the answer.
All I knew is that I sneered at the idea of “The Rapture” and just went about my life as usual. The thought did cross my mind to ask for forgiveness for some personal stuff I would have done but in my mind these weren’t major sins (as if sin has degrees or categories), so I felt I was in a good place to be “called up to meet HIM”.
Then as the 6:00pm deadline fast approached, various thoughts started to plague me:
I thought about people that I no longer speak to and whether I should tell them that I hold no grudge or animosity towards them. Then I realised that I didn’t, but I didn’t want those idiots thinking that I missed them or still acknowledged their existence. Forgive me Father for being haughty!
I thought about people who owed me money and were delinquent in paying me back or even acknowledging that they owed me money.- That just made me want to say a prayer for “lost causes” and forgive myself for being stupid enough to loan them the money in the first place. I realised that over the years I did wish harm or some sort of karmic fury on them but since I know it didn’t happen, I will leave it all to God. Forgive them Father. I finally have.
I thought about my family and my relative distance from them emotionally and how I should seek to correct it. – Then I realised that I saw no effort on their part to correct it either so it must work for them as well. Forgive me Father for not wanting to fix this.
I thought about the people who can’t seem to keep my name out of their mouths and thoughts and those who don’t have a kind word to say about me. Then I realised that they all just want piece of this “hunk of burning love” and they hate that they can’t and will never get any of it. Forgive me for my inflated ego
I thought about the secrets that I kept for people and for myself and whether I should tell some people the whole truth about some situations. Then I realised that I would be creating drama and possibly upsetting the lives of some married couples, friends, enemies and family. Nah, these can stay buried. It is truly amazing the things people confess to you when they are in crisis and how easily they forget about it. Forgive me for thinking about using the info to my advantage.
I thought about my love of food and my weight. Then I realised Jesus wasn’t the one who had issues with my size or love of food. It was me and all the negative images and people that I allowed to harass my soul. Forgive me for listening to idiots and not you
I thought about the unfulfilled life: the lack of children, the absence of a partner, the need for a home of my own, the unrealised musical career, the underutilization of my talents….I could go on but there’s no use. Choices are made, decisions are taken and life goes on. The paths that I have chosen may not have always been the easy ones and I know some were chosen for me because I failed to make a decision fast enough but I’m glad. I have no regrets. Thank you Lord
I then asked God for forgiveness for anyone I may have intentionally or unintentionally hurt and also just to have mercy on this often confused and sometimes, weary soul.
Then 6:00pm came and nothing happened.
6:05pm – Nothing.
6:06pm – Wrote on Facebook : sigh….. I’m still here! So I guess work on Monday….
6: 10pm – Called my Mom. She was still here. I thought for sure she would go….
6:15pm – Wondered if Pastor Cuffie was still here?
6:25pm – Tried to get some sleep and see if it happens then
11:50pm – Nope nothing….Steups!!
I realise now that I have been granted a stay of execution and so I have time to make things right with my life and with those around me.
I slept all day Sunday…….
What I learned I rejected but I believe again
I will suffer the consequence of this inquisition
If I jump in this fountain, will I be forgiven?
We all had our reasons to be there
We all had a thing or two to learn
We all needed something to cling to
So we did
We all had delusions in our head
We all had our minds made up for us
We had to believe in something
So we did