Flirt (The Goodbye Edition)

16 Jul

On June 29, 2012 around 3.30pm, while walking back to my desk, I saw “the cleaner” walking in my direction. I continued on my way as she has gotten really good at ignoring me when she passes (or is it that I have gotten good at it?) Anyway, I hear a soft voice calling out my name. I continue to my desk pretending I did not hear it because I refuse to acknowledge people who feel a need to use baby voices to try and get their way with other people.

Cleaner: (baby voice ) Hi Steforrrrn..I was calling you just now. Yuh didn’t hear me?

Me: No. Why are speaking like that? You swallowed helium?

Cleaner: (giggles) No. You mean eh…. I just trying to talk to you so no one can hear.

Me: Ummm everybody know you talking to me now so what’s the big deal?

Cleaner: Oh Gosh boy. Why you so?

Me: How can I help?

Cleaner: Well I wanted to let you know that today is my last day here.

Me: Oh?

Cleaner: Yes, I got a job at (protecting company name) and I start in a week’s time

Me: Congratulations! What are you going to do there?

Cleaner: Well I going and do graphics there.

Me: (sarcastic tone) Uh Huh…

Cleaner: So what I look like I don’t know about graphics and stuff? I real good with it.

Me: Oh no I wasn’t doubting you. (lie) It is just that you never struck me as the computer graphics type.

Cleaner: Well if you had gotten to know me as I wanted, you would’ve known all dat.

Me: My bad. Well I guess that is my loss. But congratulations again and I wish you all the best in the new job.

Cleaner: (blushing) Thank you Steforrrrn. Ah go miss harassing you?

Me: Harassing Me? You give me up when yuh find some man on one of the other floors. Yuh feel I doh hear about you flirting with other men.

Cleaner: Ay Ay like yuh was keeping tabs on me?

Me: Nope. People came willingly and maliciously to tell me that the big bottom cleaner horning me with so and so from 3rd Floor.

Cleaner: (gasps) Oh my goodness. These people in here not easy. Anyway me and him are just friends. My boyfriend would be upset if he heard that.

Me: You have a man now? A co-worker or an Army man?

Cleaner: Why you so? Yes he in the Army and he is a really nice guy. Takes care of me. Unlike you.

Me: Me? Umm we were never together!

Cleaner: Daz your fault. But anyway, daz all I wanted to tell you. So when you miss me is because I have gone to the new job.

Me: Well thanks for the heads up. Take care of yourself and leave de darkies alone in S—-  – alone ok?

Cleaner: Ummm they better leave me alone.

Me: Hahahahahaha. Have a good weekend!

Cleaner: Bye Steforrrn.

Me: It Ste-fan! Fan!

Cleaner: Yh dats what I said.

As she walked away, I was amazed at how well I had dodged that bullet for all this time. Later, on my drive home, I reflected on her time and found myself slightly embarrassed by the fact that after all these years I still did not know her name yet she knew mine (well the derivation of it she used).  I would go through my mind and still not come up with any episode or situation that I may have asked for her name.  Wait…It’s….Err..



I either referred to her as “big bamcee” or “blondie” (she changed hairstyles and colors really often).  She blushed at both references.  Or if I was in a playful mood way back in the beginning I would just stand in front of her and say “Good Morning” and just walk away.  (No that wasn’t evil nor was I toying with her feelings).

No one on my floor knew her name either. They just referred to her as “Stefan’s girlfriend”. Hahahahaha funny….

The slight snob in me doesn’t believe that she is going to the new job to be a graphic artist but rather to clean for them.  Relax, I am working on the snobby part but I sometimes find it difficult when people try to impress you with stuff that you could find out independently. Just tell the truth.

I am not going to call the new place to find out if she is a graphic artist. That would imply that I care. And well……


For a look at earlier Flirt blogs, see the links below:


Flirt(Part 2)

Flirt (Part 3)

Flirt (Part 4)

Flirt (The Conclusion?)

Flirt(The OCD Edition)

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Posted by on July 16, 2012 in Humor, Uncategorized


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