Category Archives: Movies


  1. I think the 30 minute wait for a roti at Don’s should be declared a criminal offence. You must know your daily traffic and volumes by now to fix this problem! But OOOOH the roti tasted GOOD!
  2. Saw the video from Mad Cobra’s “Flex” in a taxi on Saturday night. The driver had a tablet built into his Nissan Sentra dashboard for passenger viewing. I had forgotten how boring that video was.
  3. Had two people, on separate occasions, point out afterwards that the respective cashiers were flirting with me. While I’m so oblivious to most flirting episodes directed me; in hindsight,  I realised that my food orders  on both occasions didn’t reflect any ounce of favoritism. #theywerejustbeingpolite #imeasylikesundaymorning #iputoutforfood
  4. So Trouble has been bullying Heff since his arrival. On Sunday night, they had a fight (Instigated by Trouble, of course) and lo and behold Heff pinned Trouble to the ground briefly and she was in shock. I gave Heff the biggest hug and rub belly for that move. #proudpapa #saynotobullies
  5. Apparently Maxi Drivers don’t take too kindly when you go into another Maxi when they were apparently waiting for you. It’s only been a few weeks, why this man assuming a special friendship? It’s only $5 we are exchanging daily and mild small talk.
  6. I think I bring out the crazy in people. It may be dormant but somehow interacting with me activates this “tick”.
  7. The shock and awe when you realise the Award Winning Actor from 12 Years A Slave, & Doctor Strange (Mordo) – Chiwetel Ejiofor played the Drag Queen Lola in the Movie Kinky Boots.
  8. I’m not gaining weight, however over this week, two of my work trousers ripped in the back. I’m guessing that fitted trouser look is not for me.
  9. Sat in the front passenger seat of a Left Hand Drive Taxi and a Traffic Police officer in St James shouted at me to get off my phone. I stared at him and said “ Do you see a steering wheel near me?”. He tried to give me a “bounce” to try to diffuse the situation.
  10. Benetton staff no longer insult me about not having my size when I go shopping there. This development confuses my low self-esteem. Any recommendations for clothing store that insults their customers?
  11. I was challenged by someone (based on my Sports’ post) to “quit my bitching and man up”. Strange though, since he is the one in Family Court for Child Maintenance.
  12. Saw a woman moisturizing her leg outside the entrance of Rituals St Clair with the Jergens bottle on the table who told me to mind my business as I passed. “Oh so sorry, didn’t realise this was your bedroom!” She let out one scandalous laugh. I wasn’t moved to join in.
  13. People have been asking me if I’m willing to adopt another dog. As a single parent, I cannot afford another one especially since Trouble needs to see a Psychologist and Heff needs to be enrolled in a Sports Camp or gym (that dog lazy!!!).
  14. Little Caesar’s Pizza in Valsayn isn’t bad at all. Wings are cheaper and bigger than those you get at …………….. The pizza is ready in less than 10 mins and it’s not as oily as ……………… or as rubbery as.………… (fill in the gaps)
  15. My PS3 has given me the yellow light of death after 6 years of faithful use. No flowers by request. Monetary donations will accepted and will be forwarded to its favorite charity. ME!!!
Leave a comment

Posted by on June 16, 2017 in Emotions, Fitness, Food, Humor, Movies, RANT, Uncategorized


Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

As Good As It Gets!

I was honestly going to let it slide but since my brain can’t let things rest until I have aired it outside of my head, here goes…….

Late Sunday night, I got a Facebook alert telling me someone had mentioned me in a comment. Curious as to why I am being mentioned (plus I like the attention) I looked;

Here is the result:

Umm I was shocked at the detail he went into and how personally he took every aspect of the movie. Many things sprung to mind the day after this Facebook post and here are a couple thoughts (some were expressed to him on his page).

• It is a freaking Zombie movie! What part of reality is this based?
• Someone takes my reviews seriously?
• Were there no positive racial tones in the movie? Wait! it’s a FREAKING movie about ZOMBIES!!! WHO CARES?

I read all the comments on his page and only one conclusion came to mind.

People actually take my movie reviews seriously?

I mean, come now, I post three to four sentence dribbles about movies I have seen on my Flixster account and some of those comments may appear on my Facebook page but I really don’t make much out of it. I just see it as one human ranting succinctly on stuff. However, to think that there are people out there who value my opinion on something…well… I feel….honored…even though my opinion is always just that.
MY OPINION! Ebert & Roeper I’m certainly not!

I have been known to be wrong on some occasions, not many, but just a few occasions.

I love movies! Always have, always will. I am one of those children that didn’t play outside much. It’s not that children didn’t want to play with me, there was just so much going on, on TV, in books and in the Cinema!!! Who wants to get sweaty when you can lie down with a good book and a pack of Crix or be in front of the TV with a bag of “Rough Tops” or “Shirley” biscuits, or at the movies with my usual staple: A Large popcorn and a bottle of water! Sigh…the simple pleasures

I just relish what I see on screen and transport myself into each and every world that is displayed. Of course, during the course of my life, I have exhibited behaviour like Keron and therefore expressed my displeasure at either the lack of “black” characters in a movie or the fact that they always die off early. Then I realised, if it’s a good movie, what does it matter? If these things bothered me so much then obviously I should be doing something about it instead of just complaining or boycotting movies.

But I digress….My awakening to how stupid I was being came one day in London while watching De-Lovely with my friend Matthew in one of the Odeon Cinemas. The movie was going really well and I was thoroughly enjoying it and then it happened: Nearing the end of the movie, they snuck in Natalie Cole singing “Every time We Say Goodbye”. At what was supposed to be a poignant and heartfelt moment in the movie, I let out a loud “Steups” and said “this is when they bring the black woman in?” Matthew was not pleased at all and afterwards made me realise that instead of enjoying the movie for what it was, I turned it into something about race, instead of what it was meant to be; a moment to have allergies at up.

I wouldn’t say that from that moment on, I was cured of my affliction, but over time I realised that if I made an effort to see someone’s work on the screen (be it Josh Whedon, M. Night Shama-lama-ding-dong, Adam Sandler or gulp Tyler Perry) I deserved to let them tell their story the way they wanted it told. After all it is THEIR story. Afterwards, I would make my usual comments about poor script or plot development or bad acting but I would never bring race into the issue, unless it was blatant like what George Lucas did in the Star Wars Prequels. Then again all those Prequels were bad on so many levels, you realise that all the money he had could not save a big budget disappointment.

Now I can expound on the virtues of loving yourself and understanding your place in the universe or ensuring that people create positive images for young children to look up to but that is not my place.

My place is as a viewer. To drink the “kool aid’ on screen and if it doesn’t agree with me, then so be it!

As I look over World War Z in my mind, for what it was it still isn’t a bad movie. I may not have agreed with some choices made by the director but the movie was entertaining. I loved that they chose to make the zombies fast paced and manic. It set my heart racing and well, my bladder could not hold the 32 oz drink for the entire movie, since my stomach contracted way too many times during certain scenes. I would definitely watch it again.

While Keron sought to highlight every bad decision people made in the movie using black characters, he somehow failed to see the bad other races (Well only Caucasians as he put it) did or even asked himself if he would have made a similar choice if he was in that particular situation.

SPOILER ALERT: I too would’ve made the same choice the Deputy Secretary General of the UN made once I thought Brad Pitt’s character was dead. Why was I keeping them on the ship taking up space? He transported them to a secure facility in Canada and not back to a zombie infested city!

So what if the black police officer decided to get some groceries too in the midst of chaos, is his family supposed to go hungry while the entire world goes crazy? At least he didn’t try to kill anyone like the Caucasian man was doing to Brad Pitt’s wife. Steups, why am I justifying a zombie movie!!

It irks me when people get all black conscious in a movie when those same people would sit through a stinking Tyler Perry movie that does nothing to uplift the image of black people beyond the stereotypes of being people who pray a lot after cussing out everyone for the first half of the movie (Sorry that’s called redemption). Every so-called heroine in a Tyler Perry movie needs a man to save her! Why is that? I just don’t get it!

At some point we need to get over ourselves. If we are not the agent for change in our lives then don’t expect others to do it for us!. If you cannot handle or like the way black characters are handled in movies then DON’T WATCH THEM!!! It is always going to upset you.

I am not saying to be totally blind but at some point your decisions have to be either to avoid these things that offend you or DO something about it or just grin and bear it.

I leave you all with a quote from a character called Melvin Udall from the movie  “As Good As It Gets”! Yes the movie had a low minority presence and the woman he said this line to was Latina (but it didn’t offend me).

“Sell crazy someplace else, we’re all stocked up here!”

1 Comment

Posted by on July 2, 2013 in Emotions, Entertainment, Humor, Movies, RANT, Uncategorized


Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

2012 – My Lists (Entertainment)

Not that my lists matter in the grand scheme of things but here is how my 2012 went in terms of movies, music television and books.


I bought over 50 albums this year and it is sad to say but i barely listened to music this year. I don’t know what had me so distracted but i felt as if nothing much was moving me and this year’s crop of tunes were no help. There were alot of cool songs but when it came to albums, well let’s say, i will be buying less and less albums as the years go by and just more songs


  1. Pink – Truth About Love: Pink ROCKS!! She kicks ASS! And this album is a gem amongst the drivel of bad albums I had this year.  Try, The Great Escape, and Slut Like Me are always on repeat.
  2. Emelie Sande – Our Version of Events : While I still believe this album chronicles a break up in all it stages. It is still a refreshing sound from this artist. “Clown” is my favourite song.
  3. Robert Glasper Experiment – Black Radio: Recommended by a friend and loved for life by me. This refreshing Jazz infused album just flooded my ears and found a home within. Lalah Hathaway, Meshell and Ledisi sing on it. Need I say more? Listen to “Gonna Be Alright” featuring Ledisi as an introduction, then hear Lalah’s “Cherish the Day” and stay for more.
  4. Lionel Richie – Tuskegee : I bought this on a slow day and found myself loving the country twang on these remakes of his classic songs. What a way to refresh an artist’s catalogue.
  5. Pitch Perfect Original Movie Soundtrack – Such a great movie and such a fun soundtrack. Since You’ve Been Gone and the Bella’s Finale medley are killer.
  6. Maroon 5 – Overexposed : Solid Album
  7. Delta Rae – Carry The Fire: “Bottom of the river” and its video hooked me and “When Tomorrow Comes” made me buy the album and savour it!
  8. Ella Andell – Bring Down the Power.: While stuck in Piarco Airport for 3 hours waiting for a LIAT flight to Curacao to arrive, I heard this album in its entirety and realised that I have been neglecting the awesomeness of this lady of the soil with a killer voice.


  1. Frank Ocean – Channel Orange : Because of  all the hype surrounding him, I haven’t even taken the wrapper off the album.
  2. Brandy – Two Eleven: Despite the auto-tuned voice all over this album, I enjoyed a few tracks after it got stuck in now defunct stereo.
  3. Heather Headley – Only One in the World: I wanted and wished to love this album more than anything else but it felt incomplete for me and just missing her magic. It’s not a bad album just not my favorite from her. “I Wish” still remains a classic song.



  1. Macy Gray – Covered (A voice can grate on your ears for so long without causing it to bleed)
  2. No Doubt – Push and Shove (Right to the back of my music collection! What the hell was this?)
  3. LMFAO – Sorry For Party Rocking (and for buying this waste of time album even if it was on sale)



  • Pitch Perfect
  • Argo
  • Life of Pi
  • The Avengers
  • Chronicle
  • Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
  • 21 Jump Street – still shocked I liked it
  • Ted – irreverent and hilarious


  • Prometheus – I fell asleep twice trying to watch it
  • Total Recall – I recall it not being this much Bovine Excreta! Kate Beckinsale rocked though!
  • Rock of Ages –still trying to figure out what went wrong with this movie. Oh Yeah it was a really bad Broadway Show!!
  • Dark Shadows! –Ah want meh money back!
  • Savages – See Dark Shadows
  • Taken 2 – took my money is right
  • Tyler Perry movie and actor!! –
  • All Adam Sandler releases
  • The Expendables 2 – so disappointed in this sequel

SIDE NOTE::Let me just state that I refuse to acknowledge how much I liked Breaking Dawn Part 2 but that was mainly because Bella actually had a personality. Who knew being dead improved her insufferable whorish teenage ways!  The Fight scene in the open field is what made me appreciate suffering through all the other awful ones, but I REFUSE to make mention of it on any list!!




  • Scandal (Guilty Pleasure) – You can ignore the over-acting and some unbelievable scenarios and just fall into this drama that keeps you on your toes and your heart racing.
  • Downton Abbey – brings out the aristocracy in us all. The Dowager Countess Lady Grantham kicks ass!
  • Arrow
  • Homeland
  • Duck Hunters
  • The Voice –USA
  • New Girl
  • Mindy Kaling Project
  • Tosh.0 – I cant help but watch this clip show!

Worst – I have given up on you

  • True Blood – I don’t know what this season was about but I’m glad it’s over.
  • Boardwalk Empire – Errr
  • Once Upon A Time – I am lost!
  • Grey’s Anatomy – Enough with the Meredith suffering crap!!
  • X Factor USA – This show is just awful


This is embarassing but out of the 20 books i purchased over the course of this year, i have only fully read two of them.

  • Mark of Athena by Rick Riordan
  • Perks of being a Wall Flower – Stephen Chbosky

Both were really good I am also not ashamed to say that the first book is geared towards young adults/teenagers but the writing is so good and takes me back to my love of Greek/Roman Mythology.

Here are the books that I have started but yet to complete:

  • NW- Zadie Smith (My fear is that this will be as bad as The Autograph Man)
  • The Power of Six- Pittacus Lore (Sequel to I am Number Four)
  • The Night Circus – Erin Morgenstern
  • Look Who It Is Alan Carr My Story – Alan Car (Very funny but still don’t know why I never picked it back up)
  • A Storm of Swords – George RR Martin (I am told it gets really good but I find the pages with Kaleesi to be insufferable and so I keep putting it down)

I would honestly blame my fickle personality to not be able to commit to a book but honestly, there are books from last year i am yet to complete. It took 2 years to finish Midnight’s Children and I still wasn’t over the moon in love with it like most other people were.

Here’s to 2013 and may my focus return so that these lists will make more sense in the future.

Leave a comment

Posted by on December 31, 2012 in Books, Entertainment, Humor, Movies, Music, TV


Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Best of Me (Movie + Music Lists)

Here are a couple of my year end listings on 2011 and what it was like in my universe!

That is…The degree to which I either smiled internally or sighed deeply (with rolling of eyes simultaneously) out of frustration.


This year I purchased 50 CDs as opposed to the 88 last year. I barely had time to listen to music this year but it is getting harder to find good music you can sink your teeth into and make an actual connection with. I found myself liking songs more than albums and couldn’t understand the lack of good music that was characteristic of this year. A lot of new names and old faces make my for this year but out of the lot, here are the few worth mentioning

Songs That Hooked Me!

  • Pumped Up Kicks – Foster the People (how could you not like it!!)
  • Blow – Ke$ha (Yes, I am ashamed)
  • Heaven – O.A.R.
  • Nothing – The Script
  • Rumor Has It – Adele
  • Skyscraper – Demi Lovato
  • Raise Your Glass – Pink & The Warblers version
  • F**king Perfect – Pink
  • Super Bass – Nicki Minaj

Songs That Rode my Second to last NERVE!!

  • Cheers (Drink To That)- Rihanna ( UGH!!!)
  • Born This Way – Lady Gaga (Yuh mean Oh Geed!!)
  • Jason Derulo/Taio Cruz (which ever one they pretending to be right now)
  • Motivation – Kelly Rowland (the video did not save it)
  • Friday – Rebecca Black (Need i say more?)

Favourite Albums -2011

Adele “21” – If this wasn’t on the list I need to be shot!!

Sara Bareilles “ Kaleidoscope” – I bought it last year but listened to it non-stop this year. Sweet catchy album!!

Original Broadway Cast “The Book of Mormon” – Those South Park guys hit a home run with this soundtrack!! Every song is infectious.

Demi Lovato “Unbroken” – Was expecting fluff but found an album that is not half bad to listen to and Skyscraper just seals it for me

Glee: The Music presents The Warblers – After being bored by hearing Lea Michelle belt every number on the other CDs, Darren Criss’ voice on this one is a breath of fresh air.

Katy Perry “Teenage Dreams” – She needs to thanks somebody for such an unexpectedly good album. This could not be all her work.

Pitbull “Planet Pit” –  This is really catchy and well produced.


Jill Scott “ The Light of the Sun” – Looks like it went out. Apart from Hear my Call and So in Love, I had no connection with this album whatsoever and the latter song was a stretch at best. It hurt deeply

Beyonce “4” – Just for starting the album with 1+1 she deserves to be here.  Love on Top is a good apple in a barrel of rubbish.

Kelly Clarkson “Stronger” – I don’t know what this album is but somehow her widely panned album “My December” seems like Grammy Award winning material over this pile of something she put together here.

Joss Stone “LP1”Karma is a sweet track but her voice sounds the same raspy shouter Baptist way on every song. She is wasting her instrument and needs a new producer to give her more depth.


Please note that there are a lot of movies this year that I haven’t seen but out of the ones I did see here is my quick review:




The Help I Am Number 4 The Mechanic
Sherlock Holmes Adjustment Bureau Sanctum
Warrior Limitless Unknown
Rise of the Planet of The Apes Wimpy Kid 2 Paul
Drive Hanna Hangover 2
Rio Super 8
Fast Five CaptainAmerica
Thor Cowboys & Aliens
Bridesmaids Final Destination 5
X-Men First Class Fright Night
Transformers 3 Colombiana
Horrible Bosses The Thing
Harry Potter 6 -Part 2 Puss-In Boots
Friends With Benefits Tower Heist
Real Steel Breaking Dawn
Muppets Happy Feet 2
Mission Impossible 4  The Expendables
In Time

Then the Rest



Sucker Punch Season of The Witch
Scream 4 Beastly
Green Hornet Red Riding Hood
The Eagle The Smurfs
Arthur Immortals
Priest Big Momma – Like Father Like Son
Pirates of The Caribbean 4 Tyler Perry- Big Happy Family
Green Lantern Conan
Bad Teacher  Your Highness
The Adventures of Tin Tin
Arthur Christmas
1 Comment

Posted by on December 29, 2011 in Entertainment, Movies, Music, Uncategorized


Tags: , , ,

This is Not A Fete In Here………

This is MADNESS!!

Now see here!

Listen up People!!

When I go to the movies, I go for the escape of reality. To drown myself in another world where someone else has problems and is finding a solution in a comedic, violent, dramatic or sci-fi way. I just love the MOVIES!!!

What I DON’T like is having my movie going experience interrupted by a cell phone ringing and the person answering it and trying to talk above the movie into their phone. I also don’t appreciate the need to relate or talk through the movie with your significant other. If you want to discuss the movie, RENT IT!!  I did not pay money to hear you ask “Why is will power de color green?” or “How come the chinee boy from the other movie in this one” Sigh….

I just can’t win. And the thing is, there is no single  race, color or creed offender.  Everyone seems to do it. Some more than others.  Whether it be granny on the phone telling her nephew that the movie almost done so he has to come pick her up or the one who decided mid-way into Thor that she need to call someone to tell them to reschedule the meeting for 10am instead of 9am; everyone seems to not care about my movie-going experience!

However, I am most perturbed about recent events that have been occurring in Movietowne  –

The Influx of Natives:


One month  ago, while standing in line at the Concession stand, waiting to buy my Chicken Combo (don’t judge me, I take juice not soda with the meal), I see a girl go up to an empty counter and she is trying to catch the attention of one of the servers in the back

Ay… Ay… am….. you …. Gimme a Sweet popcorn dey nah”

“Maam no one is working at this counter, you will have to join another  line.”


She looks at both lines then walks over to my line  and repeats her order, interrupting the girl and her boyfriend presently giving their order. (I said girl and her boyfriend only because de bastard just stood there and didn’t pay for the food nor did he help her with the tray that included his food.)

“Amm excuse me but can’t you see I am serving someone here. You need to go to the back of the line”

“Steups,  me aint joining dat stinking line.  Is only one ting ah want.”

She turns to the girl at this time

“Amm excuse. Yuh could buy a sweet popcorn for me? Ah go geh yuh de money”

The girl obliges. I believe it was primarily out of fear because she realised that this girl had an obviously vanguard hairstyle that stood up and didn’t move. Plus she looked as if she was not opposed to fighting with anyone. In the meantime, the boyfriend has said nothing and he kept looking around while this incident transpired.

On seeing these events unfold, I whispered to myself…..”Movietowne need to raise their prices, yes“.  It was odd that the people around me heard me and concurred.

(Shucks, I need to remember:. Inner Monologue…..Inner Monologue)



“Ahm Ah keeping six seats for people,so no yuh cyah get dem”

“How come the commercials not in 3D?”

“These glasses hutting meh face. Ah go watch de movie without it”

“Why de light still on? Globe does take it off for Previews”

“Whey allyuh see dat commercial? It BAAD eh!!”

“Dey didn’t give me a straw and me aint see no ketchup bottles anywhere”

“Boy de have dem ting in silver containers to de side, just like in KFC.”

“Oh ok, go and bring some for me nah. Ah cyah eat dis chicken dry so”

“ahm  ah want a dollar from all ah allyuh dat i keep seat for.”

“Wey dis movie have REAL Commercials boy!”

“Look dat man nose like it in 3D!!” (Speaking of Shadow in the Radio Tambrin commercial)

“Dat Digicel commercial real bad hoss!”

“Ay…..Yow…… Ay Kerwin, yuh wah some popcorn (his friend is like ten seats away)”

“Nah man I good”

“Yuh sure? cuz I aint sharing none later.”

“Wey 3D bad boy!! Ah cyah wait for 4D”

“It doh have dat boy”

“Steups you aint see de commercial on tv de odder day? It have it boy!”

“Me aint watching no cartoon shit!”

“A wonder if I get to keep de glasses after?”

“If ah break it ah sure i could keep it!”


Strangely enough, once the movie started they were relatively quiet but HEAVENS TO MURGATROID they were super loud before this. The weird thing is that no one in front of me dared to every turn around and acknowledge the level of noise that was occuring. They were all scared.

Was I scared? Oh Hell No!  I know that one must never look certain animals in the their eyes or they will attack!

I was really curious as to how they all managed to be at Movietowne instead of Globe or even Cinemas 8. Then it hit me. It’s month-end and therefore this is their idea of splurging on something.

NOTE TO SELF: No more movies at month-end.


Posted by on July 1, 2011 in Entertainment, Movies, Uncategorized



Rush Over!

In the middle of the night, reading Small Island by Andrea Levy on my Ipad , I have the Love Jones Movie Soundtrack playing in the background and this song comes on and the bass line just grabs me and then her voice sucks me in…..

If you do  not own this soundtrack, then you are no music lover and should be ashamed. This soundtrack is one of the best!!!

The song is….

Rush Over by Marcus Miller featuring Me’shell Ndegeocello …

I love the line:
Your voice makes me wanna do things..I’m much too shy to say…..


Leave a comment

Posted by on May 7, 2011 in Books, Movies, Music


Tags: , , , , , , , ,

A Little More Homework

My so-called writing class hasn’t been going too bad so far. The reason I italicized “so called” has to do with the fact that we seem to be learning more on the history of films and pop culture than actually writing.


Yes I understand we all need some ground work to begin the writing process and I really appreciated the second class we had which taught us about a theory developed by a guy called Joseph Campbell termed “The Hero Myth” but enough already! When do we write?.  Then I realized he was giving us some basic building blocks to be better writers, particularly the Hero Myth concept which basically itemizes all the steps any hero in a story/movie is supposed to go through. (So much for actually paying attention in class).


Campbell summarized his theory into this:

“A hero ventures forth from the world of common day into a region of supernatural wonder: fabulous forces are there encountered and a decisive victory is won: the hero comes back from this mysterious adventure with the power to bestow boons on his fellow man”


It is a cool theory but I could never understand why he felt the need to use the word “boon”. Couldn’t he just have said gain/benefit/blessing? But I guess he needed to be a little complicated otherwise his entire mythological take on the basic story would not seem as fanciful (or maybe I’m just too simplistic? Bingo!!).  Anyway it is a cool breakdown at every story ever written. Joseph Campbell’s hero myth is famous for being the background inspiration behind George Lucas’s initial Star Wars Trilogy story (not the prequels, George Lucas messed that up all by himself) as well as The Matrix Trilogy (well the first one mainly, the others took on tangents that not everyone could understand. Example: The Architect and Neo scene. When that scene ended some people around me were going “Wow!! Deep”. My mind was going “WTF was that?”)


Anyway…I found the classes really exciting and was so happy to be learning new stuff in general that nothing could bother me. Then the teacher did it. I couldn’t believe it, but he actually said it and gave it to us on a sheet of paper. Yes, my friends, he gave us HOMEWORK!!



No eh!!

“Rasta doh deal up in dat kinda Babylon ting!!!”


Ok I understand that in every good class, one has to practice what is learnt otherwise it is not retained but I just refuse to do any kind of homework for this class.  Why am I being so stubborn?  Let me give you my reasons:

  1. The class is only six weeks
  2. The class and the teacher are not accredited
  3. Why give this man any info he could possibly use for his potential screenplay etc
  4. I’m too bright to have to subject myself to people who may not have good answers/work
  5. I am just real lazy.


You see my point? Honestly, if the class were an accredited one and I would receive some kind of certificate that could be added to a resume or something, of course I would be working my butt off, but this is not the case.  The teacher is extremely competent and honestly strays off the point way too much into his own little crusade/artistic viewpoint, but all in all it is entertaining. (Well not the fact that class should finish at 8pm but he talks so much that 9pm creeps up on us. Actually it creeps up on him. Not even my hints, like picking up my watch every five minutes after 8pm, gives him a signal or a clue as to the time).  He has a lot of conspiracy theories on why certain movies were made and to extent his rantings are believable.


  • Did you know that Star Trek was initially funded by NASA as a means of getting the US population accustomed to space exploration and therefore made it easier for them to get greater government funding?


  • Star Wars is all about Democracy winning over Communism?


  • Independence Day caused the enrollment of African American men in the army to increase ten-fold, while also allowing the government to halt the closing of US Bases and increase it military funding in some cases?


  • Jurassic Park was all about making stem cell research more palatable to the population.


Enough of that let’s get back to my problem. This guy wanted us to outline one of our stories for him using the Hero Myth concept and submit it for analysis. Nope…not happening.  I made a mental note to check to see if he had anything published within recent times as he has been running this class for a few years now. (Nothing turned up).


On receiving the paper with the homework on it, I buss out on loud “STEUPS!!!!” in the class. Everyone laughed.  I couldn’t believe that this was the assignment. (Here are the questions and some of my answers that I never submitted)



1.       What are your 10 favourite (cinematic) movies of all time?

Mo’ Better Blues                                                         Apocalypse

City of God                                                                  American History X

As Good As it Gets                                                   The Silence of The Lambs

Love Jones                                                                   A Few Good Men

Shawshank Redemption                                        Y Tu Mama También

The Color Purple                                                       Terminator  2: Judgement Day

Back To The Future                                                   Elizabeth

Indiana Jones & The Temple Of Doom               Kill Bill Vol. 1

My Best Friend’s Wedding (don’t laugh)         


2.       2.Who are your 10 favourite male movie stars?

Tom Hanks                                 Denzel Washington                         Daniel Day Lewis

Jack Nicholson                           Johnny Depp

Kevin Spacey                              Liam Neeson

Sean Penn                                    Morgan Freeman

Will Smith                                   Jeffrey Wright (Basquiat)


3.       Who are your 10 favourite female movie stars?

Cate Blanchet                                             Meryl Streep

Angela Bassett                                           Regina King

Kerry Washington                                    Ellen Burstyn

Jodi Foster                                                    Toni Collette


4.       What are your 10 favourite TV shows of all time?

Shameless (UK)                          Star Trek: The Next Generation

Little Britain (UK)                      My So- Called Life

The Bill (UK)                               Allo Allo

NCIS                                              Oz

House M.D.                                 Alias

Sesame Street                              Xena: Warrior Princess

The Bionic Woman                   In Living Color

Saturday Night LiveNYPD Blue

Star Fleet                                      Are you Being Served

Gimme Gimme Gimme


5.       Who are your 10 favourite male TV stars?

Michael J. Fox                                             Alan Alda

Hugh Laurie                                               Patrick Stewart

Stephen Fry                                                 David Boreanas

Tom Welling                                               Martin Sheen


6.       Who are your 10 favourite female TV stars ?

Cherie O’Teri                              Molly Shannon

Christine Baranski                    Megan Mullaly

Debra Messing                           Julia Louis Dreyfuss


7.       What are the 10 worst movies you have ever seen?

The Hours (2002)                                                      Lost In Translation (2003)

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)

The Avengers (1998)                                                Batman & Robin (1997)


8.       What are the 10 worst TV shows you have ever seen?

Family Matters                           Wayans Brothers



9.       Identify the 10 best sequences or moments you remember on TV or in TV shows ever?



10.    Identify the 10 best sequences or moments you remember from movies

Matrix Reloaded – Highway chase Scene

Titanic – The sinking and Breaking in half with ppl falling to their deaths



11.    What are your favourite local programmes of all time? Rank them 1, 2, 3, etc.

Rikki Tikki                                                   Sugar Cane Arrows

Calabash Alley                                          No Boundaries

Turn of The Tide                                        Scouting For Talent

Play Your Cards Right                            Caribbean Wrestling

Party Time                                                   Cross Country with Ralph Maraj


12.    Why are you doing this course?



13.    What is your interest in TV film and pop culture?

TV is my life. I life vicariously through the characters on any given show and in many ways relate to each of them.


14.    Rank your 10 favourite sitcoms of all time. (You can break it down into season e.g The 2nd  season of The Bill Cosby Show.)

Little Britain – Season 1                                          Allo Allo (Season 1)

Seinfeld                                                                        Will & Grace (Seasons 1-5)

In Living Color                                                           Saturday Night Live

Family Guy                                                                 Cheers

The New Adventures of Old Christine



15.    What are the favourite episodes of TV shows you ever saw?

Two & A Half Men – Where Charlie dates a witch who puts a curse on Alan.

Cosby Show – Where all the men are pregnant and give birth to sandwiches.



Now you see why I detest homework? This assignment, while a bit mundane and very juvenile, is still somewhat acceptable. The script/screenplay or story that we need to create and submit to him? Well that is another story.


The truth is, after reviewing the whole Hero Myth thing, I just don’t think that I can write that type of story. My myopic mind only sees the hero myth working effectively in Action/Adventure type movies but apparently it works for all types of movies. He recently used the movie “Notorious” as a good example of the use of the hero myth. A Puff Daddy/Diddy funded movie?  “The years of drug use must be getting to him”, I thought.


Oh in case you were wondering about my responses, well it is hard for me to choose (I have commitment issues) as different movie/tv shows have different effects on me over the course of my life. E.g. I used to love “Family Ties” as a child but on looking at it as an adult, I found it banal and just not funny in the slightest. What the hell was the appeal back then? The Cosby Show, Seinfeld and I Love Lucy, still stand up after all these years but some others just crash and burn.


So I am rebelling against any homework until this course is actually valid one. I do enjoy it still and I always get the names of some movies that I have never seen that I should probably check out (Notorious? Umm we’ll see).  I also feel really good in the class as my movie/tv knowledge is really good compared with my fellow classmates.  When someone can’t remember the name of the movie, I normally ask for a synopsis of it so I can help them.   LOL it’s really sad the comfort I take in certain things….


Oh before I forget, here are some comments made by Mr. Hyphenated Name (HN) at the beginning of every class, when we have to say what good thing happened to us to today:


“Ah jus wake up from sleeping in the car and ah didn’t feel hungry”


“Ah recently found a book that I lost for about ten years.”


“Today I decided to cut my hair then I decided that I don’t want to cut it but then I realized that my hair is in a mess and needs changing so in all of that I decided no to be so indecisive in the future.”


“today ah didn’t have a problem remembering the day before hand”


“There was a smell of an exotic and beautiful aroma of food being made and it wasn’t coming from next door but from in my house.”


I found my hair-band today and that was good ‘cause all weekend I was bumping into things as I couldn’t find it.”


Next week we discuss the basic premise behind soap operas and why Westwood Park is a failure despite its regional success. That should be fun.  Heh Heh Heh Heh


Posted by on May 5, 2009 in Movies, TV


Tags: , , , , , , , ,